Saying No To Your Child

Saying No To Your Child

Saying no to your child can give you a mix of emotions, with me its mainly guilt, apart from when its a matter of safety. Children of preschool age still don’t understand the safety element of a parent’s reaction so therefore we need to find a balance and maybe pick our battles wisely.

I’m delighted to share a post with you from the talented writer, Gemma, from Mummy’s Waisted

Thanks so much to Gemma for guest posting on my blog. Hopefully this article will help you and you can take something from it that will help you in everyday situations.

 

Mummy’s Waisted – Saying No To Your Child

 

Children are programmed to ask for things, whether it’s a new toy or yet another snack straight after they’ve eaten lunch. It can be annoying and many parents find that saying no to their child is hard. This could be because they don’t want to upset the child or be seen as the bad guy, or that saying yes at that moment in time is the easier option. But we all know what happens when we don’t say no. The requests keep on coming (and sometimes you get them even after you’ve said no!)

 

Saying No To Your Child

 

Saying no to your child

 

What if I say no?

Saying no to your child in that moment can feel really horrible, and the good old mum guilt comes out. However, I find that by saying no and sticking to my guns, often my children will move on and forget about what they were asking for.

It’s also a really good exercise for your children to be turned down, it’s such an important life skill for adulthood. If a child continually gets everything they want and are used to the feeling of gratification, when the no finally comes along, they won’t know how to deal with the emotion. It’s much better for you to say no to something, and support them with their feelings. No, you can’t have that toy, I know that makes you sad but I don’t have enough money for it today. For school age children, you can start having the conversations about money and making sacrifices eg. If I keep buying you toys, we won’t have enough money to go to LegoLand / Peppa Pig World / on holiday. I’ve found my five year old son surprisingly receptive to this concept.

 

Saying no to your child

 

No, but

It can make the no easier to say, and to take for your child, if you’re offering another solution. No, you can’t have that toy now but we can add it to your birthday / Christmas list. No, you can’t stay at your friend’s house longer, but he can come to play at our house next week.

What if I say yes?

This is an important one for parents, as often the choice can come down to ‘picking your battles’. Your instinct might be to say no, but stop and think about what the positive consequences could be to saying yes. I’m not saying that you should buy everything in the toy shop, this is about other occasions.

 

Saying no to your child

 

I often get asked by my children, usually at the end of the day, to play with them on the trampoline. I may feel tired or have something I need to finish, but seeing their faces when they’re playing with mummy completely outweighs whatever else I was supposed to be doing.

I had a work colleague with an older son, and he once told me that one of his biggest regrets was not letting his son wear his superhero costumes to the supermarket. People might look at your child a bit more, but no-one minds having Spiderman or Rapunzel in the fruit and veg aisle!

Sometimes saying yes is the right answer.

 

Saying no to your child

 

Gemma is a mum to two children and is a freelance content writer. Gemma blogs as Mummy’s Waisted. The blog features family life, parenting, gardening and The Busy Mum’s Guide To series about small business concepts.

Check out the Mummy’s Waisted blog here

You can also follow Gemma over on: Twitter, Facebook and Instagram

 

Saying no to your child

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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